Or he’s not. I don’t care. He is still my son. And he is 5. And I am his mother. And if you have a problem with anything mentioned above, I don’t want to know you.
I have gone back and forth on whether I wanted to post something more in-depth about my sweet boy and his choice of Halloween costume. Or more specifically, the reactions to it. I figure if I’m still irked by it a few days later, I may as well go ahead and post my thoughts.
Here are the facts that lead up to my rant:
- My son is 5 and goes to a church preschool.
- He has loved Scooby Doo since developing the ability and attention span to sit still long enough to watch it.
- Halloween is a holiday and its main focus is wearing a costume.
- My son’s school had the kids dress up, do a little parade, and then change out of costumes for the rest of the party.
- Boo’s best friend is a little girl
- Boo has an older sister
- Boo spends most of his time with me.
- I am a woman.
- I am Boo’s mother, not you.
So a few weeks before Halloween, Boo decides he wants to be Daphne from Scooby Doo, along with his best friend E. He had dressed as Scooby a couple of years ago. I was hesitant to make the purchase, not because it was a cross gendered situation, but because 5 year olds have a tendency to change their minds. After requesting a couple of more times, I said sure and placed the order. He flipped out when it arrived. It was perfect.
Then as we got closer to the actual day, he stared to hem and haw about it. After some discussion it comes out that he is afraid people will laugh at him. I pointed out that some people will because it is a cute and clever costume. He insists their laughter would be of the ‘making fun’ kind. I blow it off. Seriously, who would make fun of a child in costume?
And then the big day arrives. We get dressed up. We drop Squirt at his preschool and head over to his. Boo doesn’t want to get out of the car. He’s afraid of what people will say and do to him. I convince him to go inside. He halts at the door. He’s visibly nervous. I chalk it up to him being a bit of a worrier in general. Seriously, WHO WOULD MAKE FUN OF A CHILD IN A COSTUME ON HALLOWEEN? So he walks in. And there were several friends of mine that knew what he was wearing that smiled and waved and gave him high-fives. We walk down the hall to where his classroom is.
And that’s where things went wrong. Two mothers went wide-eyed and made faces as if they smelled decomp. And I realize that my son is seeing the same thing I am. So I say, “Doesn’t he look great?” And Mom A says in disgust, “Did he ask to be that?!” I say that he sure did as Halloween is the time of year that you can be whatever it is that you want to be. They continue with their nosy, probing questions as to how that was an option and didn’t I try to talk him out of it. Mom B mostly just stood there in shock and dismay.
And then Mom C approaches. She had been in the main room, saw us walk in, and followed us down the hall to let me know her thoughts. And they were that I should never have ‘allowed’ this and thank God it wasn’t next year when he was in Kindergarten since I would have had to put my foot down and ‘forbidden’ it. To which I calmly replied that I would do no such thing and couldn’t imagine what she was talking about. She continued on and on about how mean children could be and how he would be ridiculed.
My response to that: The only people that seem to have a problem with it is their mothers.
Another mom pointed out that high schools often have Spirit Days where girls dress like boys and vice versa. I mentioned Powderpuff Games where football players dress like cheerleaders and vice versa. Or every frat boy ever in college (Mom A said that her husband was a frat boy and NEVER dressed like a woman.)
But here’s the point, it is none of your damn business.
If you think that me allowing my son to be a female character for Halloween is somehow going to ‘make’ him gay then you are an idiot. Firstly, what a ridiculous concept. Secondly, if my son is gay, OK. I will love him no less. Thirdly, I am not worried that your son will grow up to be an actual ninja so back off.
If my daughter had dressed as Batman, no one would have thought twice about it. No one.
But it also was heartbreaking to me that my sweet, kind-hearted five year old was right to be worried. He knew that there were people like A, B, and C. And he, at 5, was concerned about how they would perceive him and what would happen to him.
Just as it was heartbreaking to those parents that have lost their children recently due to bullying. IT IS NOT OK TO BULLY. Even if you wrap it up in a bow and call it ‘concern.’ Those women were trying to bully me. And my son. MY son.
It is obvious that I neither abuse nor neglect my children. They are not perfect, but they are learning how to navigate this big, and sometimes cruel, world. I hate that my son had to learn this lesson while standing in front of allegedly Christian women. I hate that those women thought those thoughts, and worse felt comfortable saying them out loud. I hate that ‘pink’ is still called a girl color and that my baby has to be so brave if he wants to be Daphne for Halloween.
And all I hope for my kids, and yours, and those of Moms ABC, are that they are happy. If a set of purple sparkly tights and a velvety dress is what makes my baby happy one night, then so be it. If he wants to carry a purse, or marry a man, or paint fingernails with his best girlfriend, then ok. My job as his mother is not to stifle that man that he will be, but to help him along his way. Mine is not to dictate what is ‘normal’ and what is not, but to help him become a good person.
I hope I am doing that.
And my little man worked that costume like no other. He rocked that wig, and I wouldn’t want it any other way.
You are awesome.
Your son is awesome.
Those mothers suck.
To the poster who is ridiculously Anti-Jew, you are nuts. Same goes for those who say that she shouldn’t have allowed her son to dress as Daphne because a mother should have known that people would bother him about it. Bull. It isn’t like she let her son eat nothing but candy for a year or leave the house with no shoes on in the snow. Being a parent isn’t about letting kids do whatever they want, but it isn’t about stifling every benign decision, either.
I reiterate: you are my hero.
Good for you! You taught your son the hardest lessons of all…to stand up and face people despite what they might think, and to be proud of what he is. You have my respect!
We have evil jews to thank for this type of behavior in our children. Jews have demoralized America through their evil Hollywood garbage they are force feeding Americans. God is bad. Our founding fathers are racists. Prayer in school is bad. Multiculturalism is good, yet jews have laws against it -yet they preach it via the media. Homosexuality is good. Christianity is bad. Anything jews dont agree with is antisemitic, yet the very meaning of semitism, is jewish superiority - yes, jewish racism against non jews.
Wake up America! Wake the **** up!
So now we’ve come to bringing racism into this?
Umm… Westboro Baptist much? Or are you secretly Mel Gibson? At least try to find a blog to comment on that has some relevance to your ranting.
We have evil jews to thank for this type of behavior in our children. Jews have demoralized America through their evil Hollywood garbage they are force feeding Americans. God is bad. Our founding fathers are racists. Prayer in school is bad. Multiculturalism is good, yet jews have laws against it -yet they preach it via the media. Homosexuality is good. Christianity is bad. Anything jews dont agree with is antisemitic, yet the very meaning of semitism, is jewish superiority - yes, jewish racism against non jews.
Wake up America!
Abec - nobody said it is ‘ok’ to treat kids badly.
It’s a reality that there were inevitable repercussions from this that anyone should have been able to see from a mile away.
Lets take a look at your logic, by the way. It seems to be this: you teach your kids tolerance by having them DO the things they are supposed to be tolerant of.
I see. So, if I want me kid not to look down on the homeless, then he has to BE homeless eh? If I want him to be tolerant and loving of towards junkies, then I have to let him BECOME one, eh?
Listen, nothing about this, and I mean NOTHING, was representative of teaching a child about tolerance. This was about a mother allowing a child to experience INTOLERANCE in order to make a statement. And that is *wrong*.
casual observer, if you think its ok for adults to treat children this way your deranged. As adults its our job to teach tolerance not hate. to each their own! Hes 5, a kid, its a costume!
You should be very proud of yourself. I commend you for sticking up for your son gay or straight. People need to lighten up and get their panties out of a wad. Many years ago at a PTA meeting in Irvine the parents started gossiping and accusing my friend of being gay. Not to bore you with the details but one thing lead to another and eventually my friends parents were called into the principals office at the high school. The principal accused my friend of being gay and whatever else he mentioned…soon after that meeting my friend committed suicide. This devastated the family. The reason I’m sharing this story with you is because I miss my friend. People can be cruel. Stick to your guns and I applaud you for being genuine with your son gay or straight. Thank You for sharing, Jo
Ok - lost in all the recrimination, finger pointing, approbation, derision, and infighting here is a simple observation: As a parent, you don’t have to let your child do everything they want to do, just because they ask.
I’ll go further: as a parent, it’s your duty to *keep* your child from doing many of the things they want to do. And that’s not because you are ‘close minded’, not because you are ‘controlling’, or seek to deprive your child of something that is really fun… but because you ostensibly possess the intellect to foresee the inevitable consequences of a course of action that your child may not be able to see. And because you *can* see those consequences, it is sometimes your job as a parent to protect your child by saying NO.
What is lost on me here, is why you would willingly submit your child to the inevitable derision, name calling, and absolutely definitive harm that this stuff brings in order to make a pointless, empty, and essentially foolish stand on a principle that YOU (not your child) believe is important.
Ok, so you think a five year old ought to be able to dress up as a girl if he wants to and have nobody give a care. Fine - I get your perspective; congratulate yourself on your social progressiveness at some other time - what about your child? Had you asked your son “do you want people to make fun of you, call you names, and maybe keep doing it for a long long time after this event?” I bet he would rightly have said NO. No, mommy, I DON’T want that. And you could have added that they might be doing these things in error; maybe because they are mean, small minded, backwards, unintelligent, or whatever other pejorative term you wanted to add in there… and I’ll bet his answer would still be the same. NO child WANTS to experience humiliation and abuse at the hands of others, no matter how wrongful it may be.
What you did is YOU decided to take a stand on a principle that YOU believe is right, and you used - yes used - your son as the mechanism for you to assert your views. You knew the result even before it happened, but your child *did not*. Your son does not possess the depth of thought to share your conviction, here, so why did you allow this to transpire? To me it looks exactly this way: you allowed your child to experience this shame on what was really just a lark… to make a point: your point. Now, you can wrap yourself all up in indignation and self-righteous fury as much as you’d like, but the fact remains that you *allowed* your child to do something that you knew or had reason to believe would result in emotional pain and embarrassment for him. I can’t imagine that you did that because you had the idea that your son would like being bullied at school for the next year (or more), so again, you wound up making a statement about *your* views at your son’s expense. I think that’s wrong, and I feel really sorry for your little boy.
What you fail to see is that her actions are teaching her son the important principle of being who you are regardless of what people say and how they judge you. Building inner strength and character to with stand anything is important. This child will be stronger, more caring and accepting of other, and less judgemental in the long term because of the foundation his mother is laying for him early on in life.
Well done!
He’s adorable and he’s 5. Cuddos to you for supporting him and his decision and not forcing him to conform. This is how you make great individuals.
[...] My son is gay If you haven’t read this post from Nerdy Apple Bottom yet, crawl out from under your boulder and go read it. The post is great in itself but the aftermath of it is more what I can’t stop thinking about. Now she’s writing about the effects of that post “going viral” and the 44k comments it got and media interviews and Oh. My. God. Again. I haven’t really been able to articulate properly what it is for me to write online in these times as opposed to when I started writing online a million years ago, but I can tell you this: I totally understand that this kind of exposure is a risk we all take — some of us more than others, I’m sure. [...]
Two words: Unfit parents!
That is all I have to say.
I hope you’re talking about mothers A, B, and C.
It’s no wonder bullying to so prevalent in schools. Children don’t just get their prejudices from nowhere…Children are observant and pick up on their parents negative attitudes, actions, and words about anybody they may deem different or “undesirable” and in turn those kids direct that negativity towards their peers whom they see are different. Even if Boo’s classmates hadn’t blinked an eye at his Daphne costume, I’m sure AB and C’s kids heard about it when mommy went home and told daddy about the “travesty”. Those kids then take what they heard from mommy and daddy about Boo being different and the cycle begins. So in essence, parents are making it OK for their kids to be bullies.
Oh and by the way…ALL frat guys dress up like girls at one point or another either during hazing or Greek week or both. Either A or her husband is a straight up liar.
I don’t want to contribute too much to the drama here, but I just have to say to those of you who are assuming that The Detective is not present in his son’s life: Shame on you. That is a very hurtful and unfair accusation to make. I have read through much of this blog (not just the one presently being discussed) and I see no evidence of neglect on the part of either parent. They seem to have a very healthy, happy, creative family.
And to you SuperMom: It’s very sad that you’ve had to explain yourself so much to these people. It was completely obvious to me from the start of the blog that you were sounding off about something that upset you, and had no intention of making waves or starting some viral weirdness. Your sarcasm was not difficult to pick up on, it’s just that most people see what they want to see. I for one wish there were more parents out there like you and the detective who just let their kids be kids and not push a bunch of adult society crap on them. Oh and one more thing: Your boy looks soooooooooo adorable in that costume!! The pic you posted just made my day.
Mothers, good old moms, are starting to talk back. After years of being blamed for their sissies and tomboys. After decades during which the wellbeing of their children was routinely questioned, mothers are calling out the bullies. In so doing, they are not only saying it “will get better” (in the future) – the powerful message of a popular YouTube campaign. They are saying it is better now (in the present). They are speaking, as good mothers do, in accord with a child’s sense of time and need. Children and adolescents live in the here-and-now, not the future.
In the last couple of weeks, the stories of two mothers and their gender variant sons have gained national and international attention. A mom, known only as “Sarah,” has written a widely read blog post defending her son’s choice to be Scooby Doo’s flame-haired Daphne for Halloween. Not only does she relish how her son “rocked that wig,” she counters the bullying, and the normative tut-tut-tutting her son faced from adults. She does a great job of pointing out how gender pushes us around. Going a step further, she sets aside the “ridiculous concept” that gender variance is predictive of later sexual identity. A boy in a dress does not mean he will grow up to wear dresses, nor does it mean that he will necessarily grow up to be gay.
Another mom, Cheryl Kilodavis, has also taken things into her own hands, self-publishing a book entitled My Princess Boy, the story of her son’s quest to express his identity as a girl. Kilodavis charts the ups and downs as she and her husband and son try to help their community understand the boy’s wishes and identity. The book, written for children, makes a direct plea for acceptance, and points toward the ways in which the emotional landscape of masculinity is a rather narrow one; why not pink? Kilodavis, in local and national television interviews, speaks about her son as a “healthy and happy little boy who likes to dress up.” She is making a claim not only about the wellbeing of her child, but is also naming a different ethic of care and support for gender variant people. (If anyone still wonders if feminism has worked, I would refer them to “Sarah” and Kilodavis.)
Viewers witnessed a similar ethic in a recent episode of “Glee.” We watched as Kurt, an out gay boy, is repeatedly bullied. A dreamboat gay boy from another school comes to Kurt’s rescue, offering aid and comfort. Importantly, though, the boy moves from dreamy to advocate as he encourages Kurt to standing up to bullies, name the homophobia, and counter the hate through pride and self-esteem. Again, not only saying that it will get better, but taking action in the name of equality to say that is good enough now.
Ryan Murphy, the creator of “Glee,” along with “Sarah” and Kilodavis remind us that one of the pleasures of childhood is growth, and that children do not always grow up as we expect. They surprise us. As people do. Norms can only occur with variance. In speaking out on behalf of children, Murphy and these mothers point out how we prize the norm, and overlook the productive potential to be found in variance. They challenge us to rethink our presumptions about gender and what it has to say about wellbeing. Normal is normal, not necessarily healthy when it comes to gender. It is now widely documented that gender variant people enjoy the same range of wellbeing as the more normative among us, no matter how often the data is countered by ill gotten “facts”.
On the other hand, different is different, and is not some magic amulet that fabulously protects one from distress. You may be Wonder Woman, but if your parents are unhappy or are getting a divorce, you are going to feel it. You may even gender it. As responsible adults it is incumbent upon us to recognize a child’s pain. That is one of the ways in which we love them. But we cannot and must not make an immediate link between non-normative gender and pathology, or non-normative gender and homosexuality. It simply does not hold up. Moreover, as responsible adults it is also incumbent upon us to speak out on behalf of princesses, be they girls or boys. After all, where would a princess be without someone, say, a mother, to speak out on behalf of her beauty, precarity, and virtue?
Ken Corbett, Ph.D. is the author of Boyhoods: Rethinking Masculinities. He is Assistant Professor of Psychology, the New York University Postdoctoral Program in Psychoanalysis and Psychotherapy.
kencorbett.com
[...] think this blog post about a boy who decided that he wanted to dress up as Daphne from Scooby Doo, highlights this issue [...]
My niece is a girly girl, but, for the past few years has dressed up as Batman, Spiderman, and Buzz Lightyear. Is she going to be a lesbian at 5? I really don’t care, I will love her no matter what. People should let kids be kids, I think they are worried about it reflecting on them. People should grow up and remember what it was like to be a kid. Tell your son he looks great.
I think the boy is WAY to young to even be talking about his sexuality. Damn, its not that big of a deal, it seems that YOU, mom, have made it one.So what, some other moms didn’t like it. Sounds like you had are the one who made him all nervous about it. by asking are you sure, are you really sure”. He was probably realying on your wise judgment to help talk him out of it. But you were too busy with having him make a statement. (maybe so you would have something to blog about?) sorry mom.. I think you went looking for a fight and got one…
Leta: I have to disagree with you here. It’s not uncommon for mom’s to continually verify what their kids want to be for Halloween. I was Batman one year, my mom made the costume and I LOVED it (still a huge Batman fan). I didn’t care about male or female or what is “appropriate” for a girl or boy to be, I just liked Batman. Mom asked me a few times if I was sure because money and time doesn’t grow on trees!
My mom and dad both made an effort to treat my brother and me the same, we both played with each others toys and with each other. Later as I got older you can bet your life I saw those snide looks my friends mom’s would make because I didn’t like shopping and girly things, because I like video games and getting dirty while I play. It hurt. I wish I could say it didn’t, but it did. Those were suppose to be grown adults whom as a kid I was suppose to look up to and here they were ridiculing me because I wasn’t as they thought I should be.
Now I am adult and know better, some “adults” have no business making any kind of comments about others, they are no older then mental thirteen themselves and never learned to love themselves. My MOM and DAD taught me that, they taught me to love myself as I am and to embrace my differences.
Standing up for your children, yourself and what you feel is right, is the only way to go. Way to go mom!
Leta,
BOOOOOH!
Please go back and re-read this mothers blog…now pretend that you have a heart…now pretend that you have a brain…now go back and re-read this again.
Shame shame to the Mothers A, B, C and the bullying MUST STOP NOW!!!!
Leta, I am a 23 year old single mother and had my child at 17 years old. I have to constantly ask him “Are you sure?” because October is 30 days of changing his mind and I don’t have the money or time to buy/make 30 costumes. He has never construed this as me trying to dissuade him from choosing because heaven knows if he really wants to be zombie Hannah Montana I can’t change his mind. However, I think children are incredibly perceptive, even at the age of 5 or 6. Nick even makes comments to about how people change when they are around other grown-ups (“Mom, Cody says the f-word a lot more when he is at the coffee shop with friends then at home.” “Oh yeah.” “Yeah it’s kinda dumb”) To say that it was his mother that made him self-conscious is a huge assumption. He’s going to preschool and has already been introduced to main stream ideologies.
You’re an idiot Leta. Are you so dense as to not be able to read the issue? She didn’t go looking for something to blog about…The whole reason she asked if he was really sure about the costume was because children at that age change their minds right and left! The boy is who was nervous about what OTHERS would think of him. A 5 year old’s thought process is not “I’m going to say I want this so my wise MOM can talk me out of it and tell me why I shouldn’t do it because I really don’t want to but need her to convince me that I don’t first.” No, sounds to me like you were raised by authoritarian parents and if you have children are one yourself. Being a parent isn’t a dictatorship. It’s more like a republic democracy, like our country, where we sit down, discuss and come to mutual understandings and agreements (at least in the healthiest of parent/child relationships) So, sit down, maybe read this post one more time…Then read your comment..Then really think about what you just said. If you still don’t see where you’re horribly wrong…Well, maybe we need to start giving IQ tests before we allow just anyone to have access to the internet.
miss apple bottom,
love, love, love you and your family
i’m just sayin’…
(o.m.g.)
your words are so darm funny and wise…
[...] anytime soon. Blogs generally have a slow build unless you’re the mom that wrote about her son being Daphne for Halloween or the couple with a poll on whether to keep their [...]
Great Post! Good going! Glad to see there are intelligent people out there.
I agree with a pretty big percentage of what you had to say … definitely not all. But I really had only one comment … I wouldn’t normally ask this so boldly, however you put this all out here so boldly, that I will.
Why didn’t you cue in to your child’s concerns about being made fun of? This world would be great if no one got bullied … but it would sure help a lot of children if their parents didn’t “convince” them to do things that the children were sure would cause them to be made fun of.
I am really sorry for the double posting, the site kept telling me “something went wrong”
Thank you, thank you, thank you!
Thank you!
Thank you for your wisdom!
Thank you for being such a great mother!
Thank you for sharing your thoughts!
And thank you for being an open-minded, intelligent person compared to so many others.
Now something general:
It is proven, that most children make their first sexual experience with other children OF THE SAME GENDER!!!
Are most people gay? No!
How come?
Because children are so innocent, that they can do such things like cross-dressing or kissing a child of the same gender without going crazy because they violated the norm.
It is us “grown ups” who have to worry, not our children.
Most guys steal their mother’s clothes when they are around that age and a lot of girls want to wear pants and play with cars.
What the hell is wrong with parents who don’t allow that?
A child WILL BE SICK if a cannot grow up without limitations and harsh rules.
Let us hope, that some day all people will be open-minded and have a healthy mind.
P.S: AT LEAST 1500 different species of animals (you know, those who were saved by Noah, like giraffes ) have been found to engage in HOMOSEXUAL ACTIVITIES. Aristotle already knew that 2300 years ago.
So I think I can say, although HOMOSEXUALITY is not NORMal, it IS NATURAL.
Thank you!
Thank you for your wisdom!
Thank you for being such a great mother!
Thank you for sharing your thoughts!
And thank you for being an open-minded, intelligent person compared to so many others.
It is proven, that most children make their first sexual experience with other children OF THE SAME GENDER!!!
Are most people gay? No!
How come?
Because children are so innocent, that they can do such things like cross-dressing or kissing a child of the same gender without going crazy because they violated the norm.
It is us “grown ups” who have to worry, not our children.
Most guys steal their mother’s clothes when they are around that age and a lot of girls want to wear pants and play with cars.
What the hell is wrong with parents who don’t allow that?
A child WILL BE SICK if a cannot grow up without limitations and harsh rules.
Let us hope, that some day all people will be open-minded and have a healthy mind.
Thank you!
Thank you for your wisdom!
Thank you for being such a great mother!
Thank you for sharing your thoughts!
And thank you for being an open-minded, intelligent person compared to so many others.
It is proven, that most children make their first sexual experience with other children OF THE SAME GENDER!!!
Are most people gay? No!
How come?
Because children are so innocent, that they can do such things like cross-dressing or kissing a child of the same gender without going crazy because they violated the norm.
It is us “grown ups” who have to worry, not our children.
Most guys steal their mother’s clothes when they are around that age and a lot of girls want to wear pants and play with cars.
What the hell is wrong with parents who don’t allows that?
A child WILL BE SICK if a cannot grow up without limitations and harsh rules.
Let us hope, that some day all people will be open-minded and have a healthy mind.
Awesome mum!
Only time will tell if this precious boy will be gay or not. However, it takes no time at all to realize that Will and kenCurry are ignorant dumb-asses. I bet they dressed up as horse-asses when they were little, since that would explain them now right? Isn’t that the theory KC?
Oh, God Help me. If only every mother were as “great” as you are. God forbid you try to teach your child what is right. But no, instead you want to teach him that being “normal” is an abomination. God forbid a child try to be normal in this day and age. No, normal is now out, and being “your own person” is now in. Be it gay, or straight, or druggie or alcoholic, as long as you are your own person, that’s all that matters. Why, oh why, have we come so far in this world that it is now passe to teach your child to be normal. Why, God, oh why is it such a horrible idea for a man to be a man, and a woman to be a woman?
Have we really come so far in America and in the world in general that EVERYTHING under the sun must be accepted. Is nothing off limits anymore? I mean, really? NOTHING? Why are you the only correct one? You chastise these other so-called “Christian women” while you yourself are judging them for judging you. Who the hell says that you are right and they are wrong? Why is it okay for you to judge them, but not them to judge you? That is perhaps the thing that bugs me most about this day and age. It’s not that so much is permissible, but simply that I “meaning, me, the Christian” am allowed no opinion whatsoever. But you, high and might, can call me judgmental. How, may I ask, am I am more judgmental than you? I believe what you are saying is wrong. You believe what I am saying is wrong. Isn’t that pretty well even?
In reply to Tom Collin I’d like to post a lyric from the band Paramore. “You don’t deserve a point of view if the only thing you see is you.” And by that I mean, perhaps you should not have the right to judge when you make no effort to respect or understand the feelings of anyone but yourself.
you are the best mom a son or daughter could ask for. bravo to you for standing up to moms abc whom are supposedly christian women. it’s women like that, that set up their children up for failure.
i admire you and your son. and your son is super cute!
p.s. i always dress like a man for halloween… edward scissorhands, willy wonka, michael myers, charlie chaplin. they are my favs… i wonder if people are talking behind my back?
I rather have a behave gay son that a bully jack ass kid.
I thought you would enjoy this video. Turns out these “Christians” need a wake up call…
There is only one way that little Boo will grow up happy to just be Boo, and that is if he is helped to understand that being himself is the best thing in the world. Unqualified support from our parents is the first and best opportunity we have to learn to love ourselves and to develop the self-confidence we will need continuously as we go through life.
Wearing a Daphne costume means nothing other than that Boo wanted to wear a Daphne costume. It means neither that he is gay nor that he is straight. Time will tell on that score, but of this I am sure: if Boo should coincidentally turn out to be gay, having parents who believe in him and support him in his journey to be his true self will ensure that he is healthy and happy and strong. And for that he is blessed. Way to go, Mom!
I donn’t speak english so good, but I only want to say…it’s just a costume!!
will be better if he dressed like Jason or Freddy Kruegger?, I’dont think so
I admire you for support you son
Wow, wow, wow. It is the year 2010 and still…..we are hearing the same old crappola spewed from the same types of people.
1. Kudos to the mother…..you love your son and support him in whatever choices he makes.
2. Males….be them 5 or 55…that dress in women’s clothing are not always gay. It is called cross-dressing and is enjoyed by both straight men and gay men. It is not indicative of what sexuality this boy will be when he reaches adulthood.
3. Taking a boy to a football game or having his father spend more time with him doing “dude” things, does not a heterosexual make. Homosexuality is not contagious or something that needs to re-programmed. If that was the case then I would be a raging lesbian…and I am not. I have a healthy appreciation for sports and the color pink and I turned out -as you backbench pyschologists call-”normal”.
4. What saddens me the most is that although some of you will agree with my post, many of you-very loudly and probably in caps- will have to fulfill their need to spew more of their backwards, narrow and self-righteous drivel, to make yourselves feel better. Go for it, if it makes you feel better about yourself, comment on what I have written, lash out, yell in caps, or attempt to ridicule me. The fact is, like the author of this blog, I do not care and wish everyone-even the critics a long and happy life.
5. You are right-he rocks that costume like nobody’s business! :)
I just read this off one of the LGBT tumblrs and I am completely in awe.
My mum’s very much like you, she’d accept us for anything but really, can you be my mum? You’re the coolest, and your son looks so freaking awesome as Daphne. I love that you stood up for him like that. He should be able to wear what ever he wants and I’m so proud that he’s doing that and being himself and has such a supportive mama.
I’ll dress as Batman and take him out trick or treating next year, he can be whooo ever he wants to be, we’ll strut our stuff. :)
You’re married to a detective that is probably rarely spending any quality time with his son. Now, his son is going to get his attention one way or another. Dads that are cops are so emotionally detached and never home, so it’s like not having a dad at all. Most cops and preachers raise sons that are gay. WHen you and your husband divorce one day, your son will move in with you. You can be the emotionally overbearing mum for Daphne and the cop/detective will play the estranged dad part. Great job you two!!
I don’t generally like to post derogatory comments on even the most inflammatory statements, but this is just too much. You, “Will”, are an ignorant clown. It would appear that you either watch too many cop shows, or have a crappy father who is a cop. You know very little about this man, and have made assumptions that you could not possibly have extrapolated from any realistic data source. Do the world a favor and either learn some respect or keep your mouth shut.
I’ve read the supportive and nonsupportive comments, not all but many, and I truly believe that accepting your son’s homosexuality at an early age is healthy for the both of you. IF ANYONE SAYS THAT DRESSING AS A FLAMING RED HEADED GIRL AT 5 IS NOT INDICATIVE OF HIS SUBCONSCIOUS SEXUALITY, THEN THEY ARE IGNORANT IDIOTS WITH THEIR HEAD UP THEIR ASS. Every gay guy knows he’s different from around 5 years on up. Your son knows he’s different. He’s obvously very effeminate (the expression of pride while wearing the costume says it all) and with no man around to love him and accept him, then he’s DESTINED to be a sissy all his life. How sad, but good luck anyway! Poor fella.. I bet noby has ever even taken him to a football game.
What would you do if he wanted to snort blow, drunk drive, act like a dick, get in fights, and/or pay for sex? Would you stifle that or just help him to become the man he is going to be?
Yes, because allowing a five year old to wear a Halloween costume is comparable to allowing your child to do drugs and drive drunk. *eyeroll*
You and your son are both the best kind of people. I wish with all of my heart that there weren’t people like A, B and C and that your son didn’t have to be so brave to dress like Daphne.
I love this line: “I have no concern that your child will grow up to be an actual ninja, so back off.” I LOVE IT <3
Your son has a great and supportive Mum. I’m sure he will grow up into a strong and interesting person.
Your boy has big courage to be who he is at age five, and it’s only getting bigger with each experience like this. And he’s got you covering his back. I salute you both.